What is it that makes tears without sorrow and takes its journey to heaven?

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In your fire you hear me scream! Creaking and whining yet I am dead before you lay me in your hearth.

Why did the man stare at the can of orange juice?

Sometimes I am liked, sometimes I am hated. Usually I am old, usually I am dated. What am I?

Two cops walked into a room with no windows and found a dead man who obviously hung himself from the ceiling, though they couldn’t figure out how. There was no chair beneath him that he might have jumped off of, or a table. Just a puddle of water. How’d he do it?

I never was but am always to be, and everyone looks forward to me

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What is it that makes tears without sorrow and takes its journey to heaven?

Answer: smoke

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In your fire you hear me scream! Creaking and whining yet I am dead before you lay me in your hearth.

Answer: log

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Why did the man stare at the can of orange juice?

Answer: Because it said "concentrate."

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Because it said “concentrate.”

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Sometimes I am liked, sometimes I am hated. Usually I am old, usually I am dated. What am I?

Answer: history

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Two cops walked into a room with no windows and found a dead man who obviously hung himself from the ceiling, though they couldn’t figure out how. There was no chair beneath him that he might have jumped off of, or a table. Just a puddle of water. How’d he do it?

Answer: He stood on a block of ice until it melted.

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He stood on a block of ice until it melted.

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I never was but am always to be, and everyone looks forward to me

Answer: future

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